Time Is Moving Quickly while I Am Moving Slowly, and That's Alright. It's Good, Actually.

I loved my site so much that it was difficult to return to the training center. The people I met were beyond supportive of me, expressing gratitude with every interaction. My principal, my counterpart, my host father, everyone insisted that if I had the slightest worry, I should lay it out. 

It was very grounding to see the school where I’ll be working for the next two years. I can’t wait to get teaching again! The teacher training here has been a bit redundant in light of my formal educator education, but a reminder never hurts, and it’s allowed me to stretch different skills to lend my understanding and experiences to other members of the Teaching English as a Foreign Language (TEFL) group. 

I’ve written it out countless times in French… But here it is in English: my school has around 12 buildings, each with around 5 classrooms (three larger, two-story buildings that hold 10 classrooms). There is a library and a computer. The cool thing about secondary school in the Beninese school system is that middle school and high school are both housed in the College Enseignment General (CEG). Teachers often take classes from a variety of grades. I asked my principal what grades he thought I would teach, and he laughed and said “your choice!” which is exciting. I intend to fully take advantage of this flexible opportunity to better understand what levels of students I work better with.

My school consists of 71 teachers and 9 teachers with around 1,800 students, meaning that my school is pretty large in the Beninese context. I’m excited about this for multiple reasons: lots of opportunities to observe other teachers in my own subject area and in others, as well as the chance to reach a large population of students.

As members of my ELA cohort from the University of Oklahoma (OU) prepare to start their first year of teaching in the United States, I’ve been reflecting on the differences in conditions of schools, and how I’ve adjusted. Students don’t have technology. TEACHERS don’t have technology. Classrooms are open air, and I have yet to experience the hot dry season. Teaching on a blackboard is not as impossible as I imagined it to be. I think the fact that I’m teaching a different subject makes it easier for me to bridge the difference. I’m an English teacher, but teaching English as a foreign language requires different skills from ELA back in the US. I’m excited to flesh my understanding of language, but I do think I’ll desperately miss novel studies, media analysis, discussion days, and more. I’ve been thinking hard about good mentor texts for my students. Give me suggestions for age-appropriate texts at a very accessible level!!! I’m not using AI to write my class texts. Tempting as it is (with the acknowledgment that I have so used it for help in the past), I want to be very mindful of the language structures I place in front of my language learners. I want them to be human and culturally relevant in every way. Considering I am already coming from a foreign position, I need to work extra hard to promote representation for my students. I thought I would feel sad to miss my first American school year, but really, all that I feel right now is that students are students and teaching is teaching. There are countless differences, but I’m adaptable. 

The students don’t have cell phones … from a management, motivation, and engagement standpoint, hallelujah! I’ve heard of plans to restrict cell phone usage in certain districts (in this case, Tulsa Public Schools [TPS] back in Oklahoma), and I’m definitely tuned in to see how that goes. Cell phones are a useful tool for schools, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the harms outweigh the benefits. 

This may sound tried and trite, but less access to certain conveniences has improved my quality of life. It’s impossible to multi-task here, but that’s actually great because it’s really impossible to multi-task anywhere! By taking things slower, I am forced to more thoroughly consider my actions, better understand the toll of activities on my energy, be more present with those around me, and far more. 

That said, I would kill for a Beefy Five Layer Burrito from Taco Bell. Don’t at me.

When I came back this week, my counterpart came with me! I’ve really enjoyed getting to know her better. We planned our first lesson for model school (an English camp where we will get the chance to practice co-teaching) to be delivered on Monday. Co-teaching is also an element that I’m excited about! The Peace Corps prefers team teaching (where teachers switch off leading activities and supporting students). This is so the volunteer doesn’t accidentally end up sidelined, but I am excited about the pedagogical possibilities! I very much acknowledge that team teaching is one of the more difficult forms of co-teaching because it requires a great understanding of one another's teaching styles and values, as well as planning, but overall, I am looking forward to engaging in the excitement of the back and forth with another well-qualified educator. It will add a lot of vigor to our environment. I also love the way that team teaching dovetails into the capacity-building goal of the Peace Corps: I’m here to engage in an exchange of culture and skills that will make me and my Beninese counterparts better, and so the effect of my being here is far more magnified because I get to work so closely with other teachers. I’m not here as a visitor, I’m here to integrate into my community. What a privilege this is!

I want to acknowledge Beninese Independence Day, which just occurred on August 1st! Our cohort was invited to share in some department-level ceremonies and traditions. It was an honor, and it was also quite fun! More specific details to come in a future video.

Other than work, I ate the most delicious tilapia at lunch yesterday. Quite possibly my favorite meal that I’ve had here. The meat fell right off the bones and melted as it touched my tongue while I took in the slow-moving river next to the restaurant. The sun was bright but not overbearing, filtering through the palm trees onto the meticulously raked dirt floor. Time stood still for five hours as my friends and I ate, drank, and soaked each other in. Pre-service training is nearing its final hours. 

There are some weeks to go, but our days at the center are nearly complete as we sink ourselves into sector-specific tasks and practicums. It’s made me melancholy before, but now, I’m proud that our group has come so far. We won’t be as (physically) close when we swear in as official volunteers, but Benin isn’t that big of a country, and the real friendships will transcend the crowded taxi rides and poor road conditions. I’ve met people who really see me, and I’m so grateful. It’s something so special to be mutually vulnerable with other; to be treated with respect even at my weakest and worst (which, if I’m being vain, is still quite good) is a thing I will never take for granted. Despite my talk of vanity, I’m humbled constantly by the people I’ve met here, inspired to take higher roads and to value myself the way I deserve to be valued (even though I do, regretfully, make mistakes). There’s this space between the contradiction of pride and humility—the roots in the dirt that let a tree grow strong—and my friends are always extending hands to pull me in. At first, I didn’t always see, but they didn’t give up on me.

Things are not always pretty. My bowels turn themselves over more than I’d like. I saw a kid throwing rocks at a goat (I told him to stop). There is no trash collection system, so trash accumulates in the street until someone burns it. A six-day workweek remains very killer. 

I have never been more aware. I am so grateful. 

So here I sit, in nervous but hopeful anticipation of the weeks and months to come. I’ll carry on as I started. I’ll make countless mistakes, meet people and practice better holding them in my mind, navigate that place between imposing and sharing. La fin de PST 35. Je vais finir avec fortitude.

Love,

Lena

The content of this blog post is mine alone and does not reflect the views of the U.S. Government, the Peace Corps, or the Benin Government.